You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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