He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize
