She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
