we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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