So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Randomize