just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
