We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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