Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Randomize
