No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize