Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Can I color on your dick again?
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
