the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
i drank out of a bidet.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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