PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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