HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
