Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
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