I'm really into asian looking animals
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
