I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize
