speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Randomize
