butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
