i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize
