Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
this boner is exhausting
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
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