This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
