He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
