The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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