Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
