Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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