walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
