Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Dignity is for republicans.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
You peed on a flamingo?!?
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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