Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
