I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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