I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
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