Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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