I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
