Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
