Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
i think im in europe. pls send help
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