At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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