Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
