what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
