dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
