I'm jealous of your bromance
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize