He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
