She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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