im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize