I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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