Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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