Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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