at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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