I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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