Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
