Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
