Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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