My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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